stumbling

flat on my face again …. i roll over, look up to the sky and wonder what the hell is going on.

and the answer is that i have fallen over yet another set of limiting beliefs that until that moment i had no idea were there. the latest bunch is around work, earning money, making a difference, being out there in the world – a real tangle of beliefs that take me away from peace and being fully creative.

i get so tired of it all sometimes – the cycle of one step forward and two (or 8!) back as i uncover these layers of should’s and ought to’s which hide in the shadows just waiting to trip me up.  and i get up and do the work, shine some light into the darkness and am able to move on, clearer than before.

and in this brighter space i can acknowledge that things are changing – i am changing. how i have been in the world up until now doesn’t suit me anymore. and that the new edges of myself that i am finding have been worth the effort of going, seriously, off piste and that the journey is worth it. i have set myself adrift, refusing to land on safe and familiar looking shores and finally i have caught sight of new land which is where i am now headed – i will keep you posted!

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“One does not discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time” Andre Gide

 

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5 thoughts on “stumbling

  1. Looking forward to reading more of your thoughts on this theme….meanwhile my mum will be 84 on Sunday and i’m off darn sarf to visit. Looks like I may be advertising for a senior au pair because she wants to stay living in her own house but needs company. Interesting concept this…and one which will be coming more to the fore in all of our lives…

  2. Lovely. It reminds me of the saying that a person cannot step into the same river twice as it’s not the same river, and it’s not the same person.

    Enjoy your new journey.

    Much love, Brett xx

  3. Hey Ho! Dear Deborah! Well you know my experience of ‘jumping into the unknown’ dont you!!
    It has been exhilarating, but like anything: ‘what goes up, must come down’ and there’s a chance I may have set my’self’ up to fail – even though the ‘self’ I am talking about cannot possibly ‘fail’ as ‘it’ lies way outside of the realm of failure or anything else of this ‘world’ – but what I have begun, I must finish or at least ‘allow’ to continue to a satisfactory conclusion – but its getting harder! Expressing the simplest and most profound all at once is a mammoth task and a pretty crazy challenge. But Hey! we only live once in this ‘experience’ and NOW is the time! ENJOY the challenge, it can only be good.
    lots of love Pip xxxxx

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